Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The Mooch

Yes, you buy a case of beer.. in college, Coors Light is like premium sadly and this particually mooch always asks for one. You are fine with it for a while, but this becomes habit. They are the "I'll get you back guy".. When? It seems every time I request it they back out like a douche. Okay, it will be simple next time it happens "Can I have a Coors?".. "No, suck my balls."

Me and the guys go out the other night I buy the case of Coors, I give the mooch 20 bucks.. I get 1 dollar back.. Using my other dollars to buy dip for himself. He drinks generously 3, but I really think it was 4 or 5.. I really don't care. My other friend is at least giving me shots of liquor so I'm fine with him drinking out of it. We end up going to Mad Mex towards campus and my friend who gave me the shots buys a round of tall drafts. I buy the wings.. The mooch purchases nothing.. He tells me he is going to buy me a six pack, fine that is cool with me.

I ask him that weekend to get me the six pack whenever.. all of a sudden this is an issue? He also tried to claim that he had pitched in for the beers at Mad Mex.. really I don't remember that part? Oh, yes that's right that didn't happen. Suddenly I have been demoted from six beers to four? What the fuck? Talk about some bullshit.. stop being Jewish get your buddy what you owe him you fuck or I'm going to start leaving my case in a mini fridge by an oven. I'm not asking for a present or anything just simply what I am owed.. I would say he is getting a hell of a fucking deal if all he has to do is get me a six pack. Apparently not? Sadly he isn't the only mooch I know, there are many who are cheap about beer. There are variants though, girls can be mooches as well. I can't stand the girls that come drink all your premium alcohol and leave.. This is why I tend to keep mine out of sight when these bitches flock through. There are also the ones that don't throw down until you threaten their life, but we don't see him all that often so it's alright. He is by far the cheapest of them all.

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