Thursday, March 26, 2009

You have to know at least one

If you're a guy there is always that one guy that separates himself from the group with what kind of ass he pulls. In my group of friends that isn't a good thing.. my friend, Sir K-Ylenfeet the Great, is a notorious slayer of fat bitches. It is well known that his hook ups seem to be exclusively with fat bitches, for a visual we are talking creatures that are around 180 to 200 lbs. He would be the star of "deadliest catch" on the discovery channel for he has a fat bitch homing device. Now don't get me wrong he is one of my good friends, but I don't understand why he just goes about plowing these big sloppy pigs. It is up in the air that he also may have a foot fetish its not confirmed, but I'm going to try to convince myself that it's not true regardless to the evidence implying he does. He is quite an awkward person and says very inappropriate and perverted things with girls around. Every girl I've had a chance with that he meets, I never hear from them again. But back to the bitches he has gone through.. lets see so many.. ah yes we will start with a girl he dated for about a year who looked like Shrek, I don't have to say much about this other than she looked like Shrek and nobody liked her. Another huge bitch he plowed at my friends house although he denies doing it even though my buddy walked in on him riding this full grown bull on the floor. Yes, alcohol was involved, but I don't give a shit how drunk or fucked up I am there is no way I'd ever touch that thing. Then he fucked this girl who looked like a celebrity look a like. You're probably thinking "good for him, he finally got a good one"... wrong. This bitch looked like fucking Gary Busey, if you don't know who Gary Busey is google him now and prepare a doggy bag to puke in. The sad part is that she was a fatter version of Gary Busey. The list goes on, but there are times where he brags about fucking these ugly ass bitches. I don't know how to break it to him, I've tried and it doesn't seem to sink in because it keeps happening. Although the most fucked up shit of all is that he has tried to call me out saying some of the girls I've been with are sluts or whatever. It's like really are we going to go down this road Sir K-Ylenfeet the Great? Although I do feel bad since he comes from a family of creepers, his father Mr. K-Ylenfeet is by far the creepiest/scariest man I've ever encountered in my life. Only time will tell if Sir K-Ylenfeet the Great starts banging decent looking girls, I'll be praying for him.

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